From the diary of a Bookworm

How often do you come across a book that you think is just another tale or love, war or hatred which ultimately threatens to penetrate through the very fabric of your existence, so much so that the process of your transformation had already begun even when you were only halfway through it?

Or how often do you take up a book, based on its popularity and reviews and halfway through it, you have this inkling that ‘yes, this is going to be the monumental one’ but towards the end, it just doesn’t strike the chords with your being?

I don’t know about you, but the former happened with me during my teenage, 16-18 and the latter happens till date! I reflect back and still smile at the thought of reading Pride and Prejudice as a 16 year old, never caring to find the real meaning of the word prejudice even. I remember enjoying the novel thoroughly, especially the way Darcy had proposed to Elizabeth (trust me, it was the most shocking I ever came across)

"In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you."

and when the schools re-opened, I had timidly asked my English teacher as to how the title stands justified :P :P

But that was the first Victorian classic/Romance I ever read and till date I am in love with Victorian classics. What words, they seem to have a sophistication and authority of their own! I never truly bought myself to reading or appreciating casual novels and books, though I have read many from Sidney Sheldon to Mills & Boons (:P ) to Sophie Kinsella to Chetan Bhagat.

This rendezvous with the classics went on for a year where “A Tale of Two Cities” followed “Pride and Prejudice”. Dickens was a genius or I was a fool…because it took me good one month to finish that book! What patience I had even I marvel at to be reading at the same lines over and over again in order to grasp their meaning!

The first Danielle Steel I ever read turned my life topsy-turvy! No, wait, life was already chaotic then, it bought some order and gave me the courage to withstand it all. Now, all those who are acquainted with what “Long Road Home” is about, please don’t for a second think that I had one-tenth as tumultuous childhood or teenage as the protagonist. But the courage with which she bore it all somehow transpired to me, when as a 17 year old I would compare my modicum of miseries to hers (yes, I was stupid enough to do that) but it worked fine and I was able to pull myself through. And then 3 years later I realised that it takes gumption to read through that book, because my weirdest, bestest and the most courageous friend could not find it in her heart to finish it‼

And then I fell in love with the books by Judith McNaught (thanks to Vasundhara) and there was no stop to the madness. Before you feel the need to Google, I will tell you that Judith McNaught has penned the most romantic and heart rendering love tales, all 500-600 pages and I enjoyed reading them thoroughly. Three works by her in particular I have read thrice over and I still can’t get over them…phew! And its so much fun to discuss about her characters. Reading one day in Oxford, I met this Burkha clad girl who saw the Judith McNaught Title in my hand and very keenly asked “Did Niki Duville get married in this one”? I was like, “hell no, this is about Stephen Westmoreland” and in that very store we stood chatting about Judith Mcnaught characters for like 45 minutes…I don’t remember when I felt so elated last.

Oh, the main purpose behind this blog was I had to pen down my reactions on reading “Gone With the Wind” by Margaret Mitchell, but I gather that I will reserve for my next post. And yes, the direct inspiration to write or discuss reactions to the works of classic came from “Reading Lolita in Teheran”…..lo-lo-lo-li-ta ‼:P :P

Transmuting into a Recluse

I don’t know when it started but I want it to end ASAP.

There was a time when I religiously remembered the birthday of the remotest relative, even my sixth cousin for that matter. Forgetting the birthday of friends was as bad as committing the most hideous sin. But of late, it seems, “birthday hai? Acha thik hai…will put a post on Fb”. At max, will tag the birthday boy or girl…that should be sufficient to make his or her day‼

When did this exactly start happening? I have no clue but yes, this is what is indeed happening. Even before calling or texting my bestest pals, I have to think as to what will I exactly talk? And after two minutes keep my phone aside….chod na..will call after sometime‼

The other day a staff at gym asked me as to why don’t I interact with others or even a single person? Is there nobody I know over here? (this question is a big thing when you are living in a small city like Varanasi….you gotta know at least one out of 10 or 20 people you meet at a gathering such as Talwarkar’s….sorry but I don’t consider other members anything better than this).

Is it being snobbish? Well, that’s what some people thought of me in the MBA classes I had joined for like two months last year…but things were really different then…but somehow was the beginning of the current situation. They thought I was a snob because I came five minutes before the class started and left immediately and interacted with nobody (contrast this with the fact I am still in touch with my friends from 10^th and 12^th standard classes). I’ll tell you a secret..you know half the time I did not interact because somewhere I had this feeling that whatever I will say or want to say, they wouldn’t understand that, I mean my thoughts, ideas and opinions….hmmm…was I being snobbish in this?

Another adjective to describe my condition that comes to my mind is “parochial” or “clannish”. But I can bet on this that I was never clannish or parochial else I wouldn’t have had such diversity of friends or friends from such diverse situations, backgrounds, streams or whatever. My being clannish is also not possible because I have never been compatible with people of my own clan :P :P

Now coming to being recluse…well I know its a temporary phenomenon and happens when people start going their own ways or have little time to share or little things to talk about. But its like in my case it has been kind of prolonged and please do not relate it with my being at home or something. I have kind of enough to keep me pre-occupied and enough time at hand to talk to friends or even socialise…but don’t feel at all up to it. (I know a certain segment of people are gonna ridicule this because of the flurry of activities and going out involved in till a week back but trust me that was also more or less made fun and exciting by presence of Harsh, Harsha’s cute and Shinchan-kind brother :P :P)

Well, I just wrote this all too randomly, without paying a single thought to what I am writing. Do comment if you connect with my condition at some point. Avoid reading it if you are bored with the first paragraph itself…

Analysing People

The simple philosophy of my life has been to accept people, the way they are and not to analyse their actions or the reason behind their behaviour. But here I am, analysing people’s handwriting and telling them, perhaps what they already know‼ Aamod, a friend of mine calls me a show-off and wanting to hog the limelight when I sit down to analyse people’s handwriting and telling them anything with which they will obviously agree :P:P

This I have been doing for around two to three years now and nothing great about that, except that I have made some really good and great friends, who were complete strangers to me at the time of the analysis. Anyhow, needless to mention that I did hit the bull’s eye at every point and thus impressed these nice, curious souls and did manage to grab a few favours, like a lunch date =>. Thank you, thank you and I just reconfirmed my status to be a, sycophant..right Anurag? :P :P

But off late I have taken up compatibility analysis, which Divyanshu very fondly calls as “Jodi Milana” and also insists on sharing the bounty, that what I get in return for fooling people, only that I don’t fool them but tell them the truth. Handwriting can seriously speak volumes about someone’s character, someone’s life, someone’s mental stability, decision making power, and love for family, even how passionately one kisses!

But what I find completely strange and rather disheartening is that the very people who ridicule it as being totally nonsensical, some way or the other insist on getting an analysis done! This has happened a lot of times and I kinda feel disillusioned as well.

But then there are some true admirers of my skill, if I may call it so. First is Kinjal, who agreed to be my manager, lol. Next is Sharad, who today confessed to having read my analysis at least three times in past four months and who also blogged about it. Then Raja Bhaiya, who gets nice people’s handwriting for me to analyse. I consider them nice because they pay me for analysis..yeah :P :P

But whatever it is, something that has started has a hobby has become a part of my life, seriously. Very few people know that I had taken up reading books on analysis, because we did not have faculty for UNIX in the third semester and our UNIX classes would be free. And the best is while Ahmed would read Vijay Mukhi’s book on UNIX, I would be reading P. Hollander’s book on graphology…lol…all in the name of IT education. The real boost came from Riki, who literally opened my “dukaan” in the canteen and had a BBI people queue up for the analysis :P :P Those were the days indeed…miss you guys…big time…

But this analysis has been profitable as well given the scores of fruit and nuts, roasted almonds, rochers, Bourneville and BR ice-creams I have already coerced from people :D

Well, this isn’t some publicity stunt..as I lay on my bed tending my swollen heels, I decided to pen down some of it….but seriously there is no need for you to analyse people and their actions, life is too short for this…just be with them, live with your cherished ones and at any time you feel skeptic about them or any of their actions, just for a moment put yourself in their place and decide how would you have acted/reacted….you will indeed get your answer  